We’re so happy one of our favorite bloggers, Rue Le Chat, accepted our invitation to give her take on the importance of women supporting each other.
Thanks Noelle! Great Piece!
By Noelle Barbosa of Rue Le Chat
When Kim and Jess asked me to serve as a guest blogger, I was thrilled to say the least. I admire the Haute Mamas and truly appreciate their unique style and effortless beauty. They get me. They get my life. They get the creative endeavors that fulfill my soul. They get my struggle to bridge the gap between my two, very different worlds and that nagging voice that taunts: if not now, when? They understand the fear and apprehension I have about swapping my tattered-to-perfection skinny jeans for a rough, unworn, yet seemingly sublime pair. Kim and Jess totally understand the importance of camaraderie among women, a topic the duo asked me to bring to light and offer my prospective.
I believe women should surround themselves with like-minded ladies who nurture their ambitions incessantly, and without judgment. To me, that’s what camaraderie is all about; a sort of “Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants” if you will. A familiar spirit (or article of clothing if you’re referring to the film) that connects us to individuals who can relate to our dreams, successes, failures and fears.
Often, I find that women compete against one another in perilous (insert: catty) ways rather than unite in celebration and (wait for it) camaraderie. What happened to the days of supporting one another?! The shame game is not a good look, my friends. And if you’re in some way clueless as to what I’m talking about, just saunter over to the comments section of any online article geared towards women (especially mothers) and you’ll see what I mean.
Don’t get me wrong, I think a little competition can go a long way. I’m a firm believer that friendly rivalry fosters character and builds self-confidence. However, I’ve found myself on the receiving end of passive-aggressive, competitive-type conversations with women all too often and it gets old. I’m compelled to ask myself how and why (I became tangled into said situation), and will I stay or will I go?
Camaraderie, for me, began at home. I’m an only child, but my mother made sure I was surrounded by endless love and support, solid role models (she and my father included), and enriching relationships with family and friends. She taught me the importance of healthy competition (I was a dancer after all) and the value of real friendship. It’s about quality, she would say. She stressed that the quality of my friendships would far outweigh the quantity. And you know what, she was right…and still is today (regarding most topics). Above all, my mother taught me that I should never envy a friend or any person for that matter. She taught me to be an individual, a leader and never (Heaven forbid) a follower. She loathes copycats and I do too.
As I enter the next chapter of my life, I begin to think about my own little family. What will I teach my child about camaraderie? How will my words inspire him or her to avoid traveling down one-way streets with friends? How will my actions impact his or her competitive nature and individuality? I know I will pass on the values I learned and I hope my sound resonates with him or her as it did during my childhood.